There are many ways in which you can prepare for, and participate in, you dogs overall health. Providing the necessary shots, diet and exercise are but a few of the ways in which we may meet their daily health demands. Still, there is one area which even many of the most well meaning owners,breeders, trainers, etc. overlook- the state of the animals mental health. Providing for this is just as important as is their physical well being.
Just what exactly can someone do to make sure their dog is mentally healthy and to detect and solve problems before they reach a critical stage? Many solutions are available to combat the stresses of kennel life, or of life indoors,for a dog(s) which remain alone a good bit of the time.
First, many problems often occur as the result of simple boredom. Just how long do you think you could go behaving “correctly” if you were deprived of social, physical and mental stimulation? The length of time would vary from person to person. The same holds true of your dog(s). Dogs are social creatures and rely heavily upon your contact with them. Again, some more-so than others.
Still, as we all know, you cannot maintain 24 hour contact with any animal - unless maybe you were stranded on a island somewhere with only it as your companion.
There are many other respon- sibilities we all share in other areas- family, career,etc.-which take up a great deal of our time and otherwise cut down on the amount we may spend in our kennels. It is for this reason that it is so important to plan things to keep your animal alert and stimulated mentally to cut down on problems which arise, most notably, from boredom.
Boredom is one thing kennel animals (and house dogs as well) face on a daily basis.
Not only is this very bad for the dog, but it is highly preventable as well. Many of the most common problems or anti-social behaviors occur as the result of boredom.
Excessive barking, fence running, digging and stool eating are all examples that may initially begin as acting out behaviors to overcome boredom.
Many of these problems could be solved with just a bit of forethought in the planning stages of kennel development. If your kennel or living area is already constructed, then there are many other ways you can provide for your animals mental health by overcoming or avoiding this problem.
First, where exactly does your dog spend most of its time? You can provide toys as a way to relieve the anxieties of kennel/inside life. Not only do toys provide stimulation and fun but they are the easiest place in which to start. Once you have made sure they are size appropriate for your dog you have a vast array of kinds and types from which to choose. If you are creative and good with your hands then you can create many things yourself. Who says “store bought” is always better?
Most importantly, make sure that they are too large to swallow.
Providing a different toy each day or week on a rotating basis is one idea to prevent the dog from becoming bored with the object first introduced to relieve actual boredom. Moving the location of water and food dishes are another idea. The introduction of fruits or vegetable slices, such as carrots or apple slices, are another interesting item the dog doesn’t get on a regular basis and also are good and safe supplements if the dog happens to eat them. Large marrow bones, kongs, hard rubber balls(larger than your dog can swallow), and stuffed animals are other choices. Remember, super- vision of these toys is a must, especially in the initial stages.
If the dogs kennel area will allow, hanging toys are a lot of fun for your pet. If suspended by a spring, they will snap back when the dog turns it loose. If you use a rope to suspend a toy make sure it is single strand. NEVER suspend it low enough that an accident may occur. The addition of bells or other types of noise makers are also good choices provided they are attached in such a way that the animal can’t get to them. Remember that you will need to check these additions frequently for signs of wear or needed repair.
If you allow your dogs out of their normal confinement, and you have an empty available space(large size is not required) in your fenced yard, then there are things you may add there as well to appease your dog. Obstacle courses can be set up in a minimum of space and with little or no monetary output. Being creative does help though it is not a necessity.
Tires partially buried, upright so that the dog may pass through them, are quite effective and fun once you teach the dog how to successfully navigate them.Even the larger wooden slides, ramps and walk- throughs as found in many children play- grounds are very effective in working with your animals. While living in an apartment in the past, Cera and I frequently visited the playground of a local elementary school to play on their equipment when school was out. Needless to say, she loved it.
Overall, the only limiting factor in overcoming boredom for your pets is you!
Thinking creatively can easily modify your pets environment so that it is safe, interesting and fun. Freedom from boredom is not only essential for you but for your pets as well. Mental stimulation is important!
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
5 Minutes A Day To Stress Management
Stress can seriously affect your health and your relationships. It is essential to find ways to decrease and prevent stressful incidents and even more importantly, decrease your negative reactions to stress. Here are some of the things that can be done for five minutes a day everyday until you have mastered stress. Most of life is basically a routine to follow like brushing your teeth or eating breakfast. You can do a few of them in a longer span of time than five minutes, but as they say-- every minute counts.
Managing time
Time management skills can allow you more time with your family and friends and possibly increase your performance and productivity. This will help reduce your stress.
To improve your time management:
Save time by focusing and concentrating, delegating, and scheduling time for yourself.
Keep a record of how you spend your time, including work, family, and leisure time.
Prioritize your time by rating tasks by importance and urgency. Redirect your time to those activities that are important and meaningful to you.
Manage your commitments by not over- or undercommitting. Don't commit to what is not important to you.
Deal with procrastination by using a day planner, breaking large projects into smaller ones, and setting short-term deadlines.
Examine your beliefs to reduce conflict between what you believe and what your life is like.
Build healthy coping strategies
It is important that you identify your coping strategies. One way to do this is by recording the stressful event, your reaction, and how you cope in a stress journal. With this information, you can work to change unhealthy coping strategies into healthy ones-those that help you focus on the positive and what you can change or control in your life.
Lifestyle
Some behaviors and lifestyle choices affect your stress level. They may not cause stress directly, but they can interfere with the ways your body seeks relief from stress. Try to:
Balance personal, work, and family needs and obligations.
Have a sense of purpose in life.
Get enough sleep, since your body recovers from the stresses of the day while you are sleeping.
Eat a balanced diet for a nutritional defense against stress.
Get moderate exercise throughout the week.
Limit your consumption of alcohol.
Don't smoke.
Social support
Social support is a major factor in how we experience stress. Social support is the positive support you receive from family, friends, and the community. It is the knowledge that you are cared for, loved, esteemed, and valued. More and more research indicates a strong relationship between social support and better mental and physical health.
Changing thinking
When an event triggers negative thoughts, you may experience fear, insecurity, anxiety, depression, rage, guilt, and a sense of worthlessness or powerlessness. These emotions trigger the body's stress, just as an actual threat does. Dealing with your negative thoughts and how you see things can help reduce stress.
Thought-stopping helps you stop a negative thought to help eliminate stress.
Disproving irrational thoughts helps you to avoid exaggerating the negative thought, anticipating the worst, and interpreting an event incorrectly.
Problem solving helps you identify all aspects of a stressful event and find ways to deal with it.
Changing your communication style helps you communicate in a way that makes your views known without making others feel put down, hostile, or intimidated. This reduces the stress that comes from poor communication. Use the assertiveness ladder to improve your communication style.
Even writers like me can get stressed even though we're just using our hands to do the talking, but having to sit for 7 or 8 hours is already stressful enough and have our own way to relieve stress. Whether you're the mail guy, the CEO, or probably the average working parent, stress is one unwanted visitor you would love to boot out of your homes, especially your life.
Managing time
Time management skills can allow you more time with your family and friends and possibly increase your performance and productivity. This will help reduce your stress.
To improve your time management:
Save time by focusing and concentrating, delegating, and scheduling time for yourself.
Keep a record of how you spend your time, including work, family, and leisure time.
Prioritize your time by rating tasks by importance and urgency. Redirect your time to those activities that are important and meaningful to you.
Manage your commitments by not over- or undercommitting. Don't commit to what is not important to you.
Deal with procrastination by using a day planner, breaking large projects into smaller ones, and setting short-term deadlines.
Examine your beliefs to reduce conflict between what you believe and what your life is like.
Build healthy coping strategies
It is important that you identify your coping strategies. One way to do this is by recording the stressful event, your reaction, and how you cope in a stress journal. With this information, you can work to change unhealthy coping strategies into healthy ones-those that help you focus on the positive and what you can change or control in your life.
Lifestyle
Some behaviors and lifestyle choices affect your stress level. They may not cause stress directly, but they can interfere with the ways your body seeks relief from stress. Try to:
Balance personal, work, and family needs and obligations.
Have a sense of purpose in life.
Get enough sleep, since your body recovers from the stresses of the day while you are sleeping.
Eat a balanced diet for a nutritional defense against stress.
Get moderate exercise throughout the week.
Limit your consumption of alcohol.
Don't smoke.
Social support
Social support is a major factor in how we experience stress. Social support is the positive support you receive from family, friends, and the community. It is the knowledge that you are cared for, loved, esteemed, and valued. More and more research indicates a strong relationship between social support and better mental and physical health.
Changing thinking
When an event triggers negative thoughts, you may experience fear, insecurity, anxiety, depression, rage, guilt, and a sense of worthlessness or powerlessness. These emotions trigger the body's stress, just as an actual threat does. Dealing with your negative thoughts and how you see things can help reduce stress.
Thought-stopping helps you stop a negative thought to help eliminate stress.
Disproving irrational thoughts helps you to avoid exaggerating the negative thought, anticipating the worst, and interpreting an event incorrectly.
Problem solving helps you identify all aspects of a stressful event and find ways to deal with it.
Changing your communication style helps you communicate in a way that makes your views known without making others feel put down, hostile, or intimidated. This reduces the stress that comes from poor communication. Use the assertiveness ladder to improve your communication style.
Even writers like me can get stressed even though we're just using our hands to do the talking, but having to sit for 7 or 8 hours is already stressful enough and have our own way to relieve stress. Whether you're the mail guy, the CEO, or probably the average working parent, stress is one unwanted visitor you would love to boot out of your homes, especially your life.
Monday, August 27, 2007
Stress Management Secrets for Relationships
Imagine how your life might be if you knew how to finally stop the stress in relationships that saps your strength, drains your energy and ruins your productivity!
Until you have released the need for judgment, you will always have it reflected back to you in your relationships. This is one of the main causes of stress.
All too often we assume that we know what others mean by what they say or do without bothering to gain a clear understanding of what's really going on. This inevitably leads to a breakdown in communication and conflict.
Stress Management Technique 1
The biggest secret to stress free relationships is to master the skill of being agreeable!
If you think about it just for a moment this makes a lot of sense. How did you feel the last time someone disagreed with what you though, said or did? Did you thank them, give them a big hug and then ask for more disapproval? Probably not!
The bottom line is that people don't like being disagreed with. This is what leads to arguments and conflict.
You have a choice every time you relate with another person. You can either be agreeable in nature and in communication or you can be disagreeable. The first choice will cause people to be more relaxed and enjoy your company. The second creates stress and frustration.
It costs nothing to agree with someone else's point of view even if you think it's ridiculous. Who are we to judge how another person views their life and the world around them. Conflict always arises from disagreement's which then leads to power struggles.
This means that either one or all parties are trying to prove that they are right and someone else is wrong. This is a no win scenario because if one person is made wrong, then the outcome is tension and resentment.
More Stress Management Tips
So what do you do if you disagree with what someone is saying? Ask if it's ok to share your opinion. If the answer is no, then to keep your relationships stress free keep your mouth shut. Changes topics if you need to or go do something fun together but let it go and move on.
Stress Management Tecchnique 2 - Master the skill of understanding.
The key here is to learn to be a good listener. Can you remember a time recently when you were talking with someone and they either interrupted you before you finished talking and started talking about themselves or completely ignored what you said and talked about something totally unrelated?
I know that's happened to me thousands of times. Well guess what, if you didn't like it I can guarantee you that others won't like it if you do it to them.
By listening attentively to what others say and not interrupting you will prevent the possibility of causing stress and tension in your relationships because the people you are communicating with will feel seen and heard.
This builds trust and respect which are two of the most important ingredients of a happy, healthy and productive relationship.
Here are 4 Stress Managment Skills to master the art of listening with the intent to understand...
1. Don't interrupt unless you have something urgent to attend to. Then excuse yourself politely and make a time to meet with them that you can give your undivided attention.
2. Look them in the eye and keep your body language open
3. Only ask questions that are relevant to the topic. This lets the person who is talking know that you are really listening to them.
4. Never assume you know what someone means, always ask for clarity before sharing you're opinion. Don't be afraid to keep asking questions until you are 100% sure about what is being said.
The only time to try and get others to understand you is after you have understood them. Then they are more receptive to what you have to say. This skill is one of the most important in building good bonds between people that are stress free. There is nothing more powerful than letting others know that they matter.
The final word on stress relief in relationships
Happy, healthy and stress free relationships are no accident. They are skillfully developed over time by people who care about people. These secrets will only work if you apply them.
The more you apply them, the less stress you will have in your relationships. I know this for a fact because they have been working for me for more than 15 years.
To Your Great Life and Health...
Until you have released the need for judgment, you will always have it reflected back to you in your relationships. This is one of the main causes of stress.
All too often we assume that we know what others mean by what they say or do without bothering to gain a clear understanding of what's really going on. This inevitably leads to a breakdown in communication and conflict.
Stress Management Technique 1
The biggest secret to stress free relationships is to master the skill of being agreeable!
If you think about it just for a moment this makes a lot of sense. How did you feel the last time someone disagreed with what you though, said or did? Did you thank them, give them a big hug and then ask for more disapproval? Probably not!
The bottom line is that people don't like being disagreed with. This is what leads to arguments and conflict.
You have a choice every time you relate with another person. You can either be agreeable in nature and in communication or you can be disagreeable. The first choice will cause people to be more relaxed and enjoy your company. The second creates stress and frustration.
It costs nothing to agree with someone else's point of view even if you think it's ridiculous. Who are we to judge how another person views their life and the world around them. Conflict always arises from disagreement's which then leads to power struggles.
This means that either one or all parties are trying to prove that they are right and someone else is wrong. This is a no win scenario because if one person is made wrong, then the outcome is tension and resentment.
More Stress Management Tips
So what do you do if you disagree with what someone is saying? Ask if it's ok to share your opinion. If the answer is no, then to keep your relationships stress free keep your mouth shut. Changes topics if you need to or go do something fun together but let it go and move on.
Stress Management Tecchnique 2 - Master the skill of understanding.
The key here is to learn to be a good listener. Can you remember a time recently when you were talking with someone and they either interrupted you before you finished talking and started talking about themselves or completely ignored what you said and talked about something totally unrelated?
I know that's happened to me thousands of times. Well guess what, if you didn't like it I can guarantee you that others won't like it if you do it to them.
By listening attentively to what others say and not interrupting you will prevent the possibility of causing stress and tension in your relationships because the people you are communicating with will feel seen and heard.
This builds trust and respect which are two of the most important ingredients of a happy, healthy and productive relationship.
Here are 4 Stress Managment Skills to master the art of listening with the intent to understand...
1. Don't interrupt unless you have something urgent to attend to. Then excuse yourself politely and make a time to meet with them that you can give your undivided attention.
2. Look them in the eye and keep your body language open
3. Only ask questions that are relevant to the topic. This lets the person who is talking know that you are really listening to them.
4. Never assume you know what someone means, always ask for clarity before sharing you're opinion. Don't be afraid to keep asking questions until you are 100% sure about what is being said.
The only time to try and get others to understand you is after you have understood them. Then they are more receptive to what you have to say. This skill is one of the most important in building good bonds between people that are stress free. There is nothing more powerful than letting others know that they matter.
The final word on stress relief in relationships
Happy, healthy and stress free relationships are no accident. They are skillfully developed over time by people who care about people. These secrets will only work if you apply them.
The more you apply them, the less stress you will have in your relationships. I know this for a fact because they have been working for me for more than 15 years.
To Your Great Life and Health...
Sunday, August 26, 2007
How Does Stress Affect Health?
How Does Stress Affect Health?
Many are now asking the question, "How does stress affect health?" If you too are asking then you have taken the first step to dramatically improving your health. Some health experts are convinced that stress is the largest health problem in America. However, this often goes unnoticed because the damage stress does to our health often gets blamed on other diseases and conditions. One study said that 75% of all visits to primary care physicians are stress-related.
How Does Stress Affect Health? - It's In The Immune System
So, how does stress affect health? Well, as you probably already know, your body's immune system is what keeps you healthy from all kinds of diseases, from relatively benign ones like the common cold to more serious ones like bronchitis. People who get sick all the time probably have weak immune systems while those who rarely get sick most likely have strong and powerful immune systems. What few people know is that stress, and more importantly chronic stress, actually weakens the immune system, thereby limiting its ability to fight off even the most harmless of illnesses.
This should shed a lot of light on the question of how does stress affect health. Someone who gets a cold every other week may just think they are unlucky or just happen to always be around people who have colds. This is not so. Someone with a strong immune system could be ingesting cold viruses all day long but they never get a cold because their immune system is capable of destroying them. So, if you get a lot of colds you may in fact not be managing your stress effectively.
There are other answers to the question of how does stress affect health. For example, there is an immune system protein called interleukin-6. People under serious stress have been found to have much higher levels of this protein than people under little or no stress. Interleukin-6 in large amounts has been associated with various diseases like some cancers, infections, rheumatoid arthritis, diabetes, osteoporosis and heart disease. Can you believe that? Who would have thought that this answers the question of how does stress affect health.
Another part of the problem in answering the question of how does stress affect health is that people don't truly understand exactly what stress is. If you ask most people, they may respond by saying stress is caused by worrying about something like money. This is not entirely true. Acute stress is easier to recognize because you can feel it right now. On the other hand, chronic stress is more subtle. For example, all people experience some stress after any big life change, including getting married. Getting married is a wonderful and joyful event for people so they are not aware that it is also bringing with it a certain level of stress. It's just harder to notice. However, that stress will still inflict harm on your immune system. So you can see that asking the question of how does stress affect health is so important.
Asking, "How does stress affect health?" is an important questions for you to start asking because it may be causing you serious health problems with you even knowing. The next question you should ask is "How do I effectively relieve stress?"
Many are now asking the question, "How does stress affect health?" If you too are asking then you have taken the first step to dramatically improving your health. Some health experts are convinced that stress is the largest health problem in America. However, this often goes unnoticed because the damage stress does to our health often gets blamed on other diseases and conditions. One study said that 75% of all visits to primary care physicians are stress-related.
How Does Stress Affect Health? - It's In The Immune System
So, how does stress affect health? Well, as you probably already know, your body's immune system is what keeps you healthy from all kinds of diseases, from relatively benign ones like the common cold to more serious ones like bronchitis. People who get sick all the time probably have weak immune systems while those who rarely get sick most likely have strong and powerful immune systems. What few people know is that stress, and more importantly chronic stress, actually weakens the immune system, thereby limiting its ability to fight off even the most harmless of illnesses.
This should shed a lot of light on the question of how does stress affect health. Someone who gets a cold every other week may just think they are unlucky or just happen to always be around people who have colds. This is not so. Someone with a strong immune system could be ingesting cold viruses all day long but they never get a cold because their immune system is capable of destroying them. So, if you get a lot of colds you may in fact not be managing your stress effectively.
There are other answers to the question of how does stress affect health. For example, there is an immune system protein called interleukin-6. People under serious stress have been found to have much higher levels of this protein than people under little or no stress. Interleukin-6 in large amounts has been associated with various diseases like some cancers, infections, rheumatoid arthritis, diabetes, osteoporosis and heart disease. Can you believe that? Who would have thought that this answers the question of how does stress affect health.
Another part of the problem in answering the question of how does stress affect health is that people don't truly understand exactly what stress is. If you ask most people, they may respond by saying stress is caused by worrying about something like money. This is not entirely true. Acute stress is easier to recognize because you can feel it right now. On the other hand, chronic stress is more subtle. For example, all people experience some stress after any big life change, including getting married. Getting married is a wonderful and joyful event for people so they are not aware that it is also bringing with it a certain level of stress. It's just harder to notice. However, that stress will still inflict harm on your immune system. So you can see that asking the question of how does stress affect health is so important.
Asking, "How does stress affect health?" is an important questions for you to start asking because it may be causing you serious health problems with you even knowing. The next question you should ask is "How do I effectively relieve stress?"
Saturday, August 18, 2007
5 Natural Stress Relief Techniques
Is your child stressed out? Some people think only adults experience stress, but it affects our children too. Here's how to help your child manage their emotions.
We often view our kids as happy-go-lucky beings without a care. But children can also experience stress. Not only do they get anxious about things in their own young world--school, friends, peer pressure--but they also can be deeply affected by outside factors such as war, natural disasters and other unsettling world events.
In fact, the list of contributors to childhood stress can be quite long. Many stressors are the result of family problems, like divorce, a death or a parent's job loss but there are also less obvious triggers such as moving to a new city or the birth of a new sibling.
As a parent, you can become attuned to what's a normal amount of anxiety for your child and what is not. If you notice anything out of the ordinary, use the following tools to help your child handle it better.
Tuning into Anxiety Attack symptoms
1. Tune in to their moods.
Pay attention to your child's behavior. Take the time to talk to your child to get to the root of the problem. Ask questions like "How are you feeling?" "What's happening at school?" or "How are things with your friends?"
When you show concern for their problems and issues, it's reassuring to them and they'll be more responsive to that attention.
2. Watch the same shows they do.
If you have younger children, you certainly don't want them watching the doom and gloom of daily news shows. Children's minds are like sponges in they absorb almost everything they see or hear.
They are especially sensitive to negative energy, pain or suffering. Shows like the news can be traumatizing and anxiety-producing for younger children.
It's important to discuss with them what they've seen. You can't tell them that it's never going to happen to them but you can say,"We're going to do everything we can to protect you". It's also a good idea to let them know whom to call and what to do in case of an emergency.
3. Focus on the positive.
There is obviously no way a child can be shielded from a major trauma such as a death in the family, a house fire or a natural disaster. Instead, help children count their blessings. Comfort and reassure them by saying, "We're strong and we're going to make it." "And as difficult as it may be, try to maintain everyday routines.
For many young victims of floods or fire, for example, going back to school, even in another city, can help bring some normalcy back to their disrupted lives. What can also help is to make sure children have positive outlets like physical activity, going to the movies or spending time with friends.
4. Lead by example.
Children often learn to deal with stress by mimicking how you respond in challenging times. Even if you don't tell your child that you're about to be laid off from your job or that you're worried that your marriage is on the verge of breaking up, they can still pick up on your stress.
They may not understand the underlying causes but they can hear the strained tone and elevated volume of your voice,which gives them the message that something's going on that may affect them too.
That's why it's so important to show them good coping skills. If you light a cigarette, have a drink, or use foul language when you're under pressure, your little one may internalize that as a coping method.
Instead, model healthy behavior during difficult times, such as writing in a journal, de-stressing in a hot bath, sharing how you feel
without blaming, or taking a walk.
5. Instill confidence.
When children are young, there are times when you will have to come to their defense and help them handle tough situations. But as they get older, you also have to let them champion themselves, which builds their confidence in their ability to resolve problems on their own.
One of your missions as a parent is to know when to step in and when to stand back. Your response will depend on the child's temperament, maturity and the situation.
For example, your third grader may be able to confront a taunting classmate on their own, but a serious case of bullying may warrant your intervention.
Still, always make sure your child knows you've got their back. Tell them, "Try it on your own first,but if you need help,let me know and I'll be there."
To Your Great Life and Health...
We often view our kids as happy-go-lucky beings without a care. But children can also experience stress. Not only do they get anxious about things in their own young world--school, friends, peer pressure--but they also can be deeply affected by outside factors such as war, natural disasters and other unsettling world events.
In fact, the list of contributors to childhood stress can be quite long. Many stressors are the result of family problems, like divorce, a death or a parent's job loss but there are also less obvious triggers such as moving to a new city or the birth of a new sibling.
As a parent, you can become attuned to what's a normal amount of anxiety for your child and what is not. If you notice anything out of the ordinary, use the following tools to help your child handle it better.
Tuning into Anxiety Attack symptoms
1. Tune in to their moods.
Pay attention to your child's behavior. Take the time to talk to your child to get to the root of the problem. Ask questions like "How are you feeling?" "What's happening at school?" or "How are things with your friends?"
When you show concern for their problems and issues, it's reassuring to them and they'll be more responsive to that attention.
2. Watch the same shows they do.
If you have younger children, you certainly don't want them watching the doom and gloom of daily news shows. Children's minds are like sponges in they absorb almost everything they see or hear.
They are especially sensitive to negative energy, pain or suffering. Shows like the news can be traumatizing and anxiety-producing for younger children.
It's important to discuss with them what they've seen. You can't tell them that it's never going to happen to them but you can say,"We're going to do everything we can to protect you". It's also a good idea to let them know whom to call and what to do in case of an emergency.
3. Focus on the positive.
There is obviously no way a child can be shielded from a major trauma such as a death in the family, a house fire or a natural disaster. Instead, help children count their blessings. Comfort and reassure them by saying, "We're strong and we're going to make it." "And as difficult as it may be, try to maintain everyday routines.
For many young victims of floods or fire, for example, going back to school, even in another city, can help bring some normalcy back to their disrupted lives. What can also help is to make sure children have positive outlets like physical activity, going to the movies or spending time with friends.
4. Lead by example.
Children often learn to deal with stress by mimicking how you respond in challenging times. Even if you don't tell your child that you're about to be laid off from your job or that you're worried that your marriage is on the verge of breaking up, they can still pick up on your stress.
They may not understand the underlying causes but they can hear the strained tone and elevated volume of your voice,which gives them the message that something's going on that may affect them too.
That's why it's so important to show them good coping skills. If you light a cigarette, have a drink, or use foul language when you're under pressure, your little one may internalize that as a coping method.
Instead, model healthy behavior during difficult times, such as writing in a journal, de-stressing in a hot bath, sharing how you feel
without blaming, or taking a walk.
5. Instill confidence.
When children are young, there are times when you will have to come to their defense and help them handle tough situations. But as they get older, you also have to let them champion themselves, which builds their confidence in their ability to resolve problems on their own.
One of your missions as a parent is to know when to step in and when to stand back. Your response will depend on the child's temperament, maturity and the situation.
For example, your third grader may be able to confront a taunting classmate on their own, but a serious case of bullying may warrant your intervention.
Still, always make sure your child knows you've got their back. Tell them, "Try it on your own first,but if you need help,let me know and I'll be there."
To Your Great Life and Health...
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Get Creative to Relieve Stress
There are many things we can do to relieve stress, ranging from small routine changes (such as avoiding rush hour traffic) to large drastic life changes (such as quitting our stressful jobs!).
At the smaller end of the scale, I believe one of the best ways that you can relieve stress is to 'get creative'.
What can you do to get creative? Anything you like, as long as 'you' do the creating!
It could be physical or mental creativity (preferably both), big or small. For example, is it about time you changed your garden around? Changed those dull old patio slabs? Now would be a good idea to get creative.
To relieve stress you have to do something you can be proud of. You need to be able to stand back and say to yourself, `Yep, I did that and I did a terrific job'.
Take the example above, if you're not physically able (and would have to employ someone to do the labouring for you) you could still design the garden yourself! Teach yourself a little about landscape gardening and design the best garden you can. If you are able to labour for yourself, design and build it entirely yourself! And most important of all, give yourself a pat on the back once you've finished and be proud of your hard work.
But it doesn't have to be so big (or so expensive). You could make a model aeroplane, do your own painting, and make something from clay, or anything at all.
One of my friends recently bought his own materials and built a magnificent kite! He said it felt great to finish it, but when he stood back and actually saw his achievement (i.e. when it was flying) he felt truly elated. Now that's stress relief!
Form a personal point of view, having suffered with a phobia of public speaking for so long, I always wanted to set up my own website - to be able to communicate in another way, freely, without the troubles I would usually have. When I eventually found a way to set up my site the pride and sense of achievement I felt was enormous. And with that pride and achievement came the stress relief I was after.
So from the examples above I hope you can see how you too can get creative to relive stress. The list of things you could do is endless.
Now it's time for the hard part. . . getting started!
At the smaller end of the scale, I believe one of the best ways that you can relieve stress is to 'get creative'.
What can you do to get creative? Anything you like, as long as 'you' do the creating!
It could be physical or mental creativity (preferably both), big or small. For example, is it about time you changed your garden around? Changed those dull old patio slabs? Now would be a good idea to get creative.
To relieve stress you have to do something you can be proud of. You need to be able to stand back and say to yourself, `Yep, I did that and I did a terrific job'.
Take the example above, if you're not physically able (and would have to employ someone to do the labouring for you) you could still design the garden yourself! Teach yourself a little about landscape gardening and design the best garden you can. If you are able to labour for yourself, design and build it entirely yourself! And most important of all, give yourself a pat on the back once you've finished and be proud of your hard work.
But it doesn't have to be so big (or so expensive). You could make a model aeroplane, do your own painting, and make something from clay, or anything at all.
One of my friends recently bought his own materials and built a magnificent kite! He said it felt great to finish it, but when he stood back and actually saw his achievement (i.e. when it was flying) he felt truly elated. Now that's stress relief!
Form a personal point of view, having suffered with a phobia of public speaking for so long, I always wanted to set up my own website - to be able to communicate in another way, freely, without the troubles I would usually have. When I eventually found a way to set up my site the pride and sense of achievement I felt was enormous. And with that pride and achievement came the stress relief I was after.
So from the examples above I hope you can see how you too can get creative to relive stress. The list of things you could do is endless.
Now it's time for the hard part. . . getting started!
Monday, August 13, 2007
Desk Rage is More Common in the Workplace
As any human resource executive can tell you, frustration and office temper tantrums by employees are not unusual, but two new studies indicate that incivilities in the workplace appear to be increasing. Termed “desk rage,” by one survey, it includes arguments between employees, pen throwing managers and workers kicking expensive computer equipment in fits of aggravation.
In a telephone survey commissioned by Integra Realty Resources, Inc, nearly one-third of 1,305 workers who responded admitted to yelling at someone in the office, and 65% said workplace stress is at least occasionally a problem for them. Work stress had driven 23% of the respondents to tears, and 34% blamed their jobs for a loss of sleep.
In a separate study published in the quarterly journal Organizational Dynamics, it was found that workers who experienced rude behavior at work had reactions that were negative for business. Nearly one-third of them admitted intentionally decreasing their commitment to the company, with a quarter indicating that they stopped doing their best. Almost 12% of the rudeness recipients quit their jobs to search for friendlier environments.
Workplace stress is not new, but many experts and workers feel that it is at epidemic levels. Several economic and social trends have escalated tensions or at least made employees more sensitized to stress. Years of layoffs and downsizing have left a lingering sense of job insecurity for many workers while demands for productivity have increased.
At the same time, the nature of the American workforce has changed. It is more diverse, includes more women, and multiple generations, which can exacerbate on-the-job tensions. There is a sense that the technology that was suppose to make jobs easier, from cell phones to e-mails, have turned into high-tech leases. Referred to as “technology tethers” by C. Leslie Charles in her book, Why Is Everyone So Cranky? She feels American workers are overwhelmed, overworked, overscheduled and overspent.
“We’re leading these non-stop lives, and we’re continuing to accelerate the pace,” according to Charles. “We are so preoccupied with what we’re doing and what’s next that we have an inability to process what’s just happened or what’s bugging us.”
Charles recommends the following tools to de-stress your work life:
• Fortify your “emotional immune system (EIS)” When exposed to “crankiness," stop and quantify the problem and put it in perspective. Is this a small, medium or large annoyance? Or something more serious? How large of a response is required? Make your reaction match the size of the problem.
• Take a “Reality Bite." Expecting, waiting and hoping for things to be different in our lives only increases our susceptibility for crankiness. Expect some parts of life to be frustrating; you will wait in lines that are too long, people will do things that irritate you, and you will encounter inconvenience more days than not. Accept this reality. Let it roll off your back and smile. It may not change what is happening, but you will feel better.
• Take time out for a Personal Battery Recharge. What do you really enjoy doing? When was the last time you did it? Take the time to recharge. Whether a game of golf, a walk with your spouse or reading a book, take the time for renewal as often as possible.
In a telephone survey commissioned by Integra Realty Resources, Inc, nearly one-third of 1,305 workers who responded admitted to yelling at someone in the office, and 65% said workplace stress is at least occasionally a problem for them. Work stress had driven 23% of the respondents to tears, and 34% blamed their jobs for a loss of sleep.
In a separate study published in the quarterly journal Organizational Dynamics, it was found that workers who experienced rude behavior at work had reactions that were negative for business. Nearly one-third of them admitted intentionally decreasing their commitment to the company, with a quarter indicating that they stopped doing their best. Almost 12% of the rudeness recipients quit their jobs to search for friendlier environments.
Workplace stress is not new, but many experts and workers feel that it is at epidemic levels. Several economic and social trends have escalated tensions or at least made employees more sensitized to stress. Years of layoffs and downsizing have left a lingering sense of job insecurity for many workers while demands for productivity have increased.
At the same time, the nature of the American workforce has changed. It is more diverse, includes more women, and multiple generations, which can exacerbate on-the-job tensions. There is a sense that the technology that was suppose to make jobs easier, from cell phones to e-mails, have turned into high-tech leases. Referred to as “technology tethers” by C. Leslie Charles in her book, Why Is Everyone So Cranky? She feels American workers are overwhelmed, overworked, overscheduled and overspent.
“We’re leading these non-stop lives, and we’re continuing to accelerate the pace,” according to Charles. “We are so preoccupied with what we’re doing and what’s next that we have an inability to process what’s just happened or what’s bugging us.”
Charles recommends the following tools to de-stress your work life:
• Fortify your “emotional immune system (EIS)” When exposed to “crankiness," stop and quantify the problem and put it in perspective. Is this a small, medium or large annoyance? Or something more serious? How large of a response is required? Make your reaction match the size of the problem.
• Take a “Reality Bite." Expecting, waiting and hoping for things to be different in our lives only increases our susceptibility for crankiness. Expect some parts of life to be frustrating; you will wait in lines that are too long, people will do things that irritate you, and you will encounter inconvenience more days than not. Accept this reality. Let it roll off your back and smile. It may not change what is happening, but you will feel better.
• Take time out for a Personal Battery Recharge. What do you really enjoy doing? When was the last time you did it? Take the time to recharge. Whether a game of golf, a walk with your spouse or reading a book, take the time for renewal as often as possible.
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